Sexting to Improve Your Relationship

Written by Dave Rich

On June 28, 2012

If you’ve been in a committed relationship for a while, the most exciting text chat you and your significant other have had in a while is probably where to go out to eat. You’ve fallen into routine and forgotten how to do “the dance”. Sexting can help put the spark back into your relationship IF you do it right.
What is “Sexting”?
Sexting is the act of sending sexually suggestive messages or photos between two mobile devices or from a computer to a mobile device. Over the past couple of years, this type of explicit communication has had its share of controversy. Primarily, because of how it was used. Politicians have gotten into hot water for using sexting to cheat on their spouses and teenagers have had racy and embarrassing photos end up on the Internet.
So why would a level-headed man like you want to use of this type of communication?
How Sexting Can Improve Your Relationship
To benefit your sex life! Just like money, guns, and technology, sexting isn’t “bad” or “evil”. It’s all in the way you use it. If you’re a married man and you’re sending provocative text messages to another woman, well, you’re cheating. But if you’re sending them to the lady in your life, it could be a great way to spice things up in the bedroom.
When you’re in a relationship for a while, it can be easy to fall into routine. Sexting with your significant other can break this pattern and heat things up a bit. It’s a way to be creative and entice your partner in a fun, exciting new way.
It could be something as simple as texting what you want to do to her later or sending a racy photo. Sexting helps create anticipation and sexual tension throughout the day, which, if you play your cards right, can lead to an explosion of passion when you finally see each other that night. But before you grab your phone and blurt out every dirty thought you’ve had for the past year, get familiar with some of the sexting dos and don’ts.
Sexting Dos and Don’ts
Sexting isn’t like ordinary text chat. It suggests a level of intimacy that requires trust. When it comes to sexting the right way:

  1. Do Start Slowly – When you go from your typical G-rated messages to full-bore porn without warning, she’s liable to think somebody has hijacked your phone or you’ve had one two many cocktails at lunch. A simple, “What are you wearing”? Or “Had a hot dream about you last night” is a great way to test the waters without freaking her out. You’ll know right away by her response if you can get a little dirtier.
  1. Do Sext While You’re Away – If you go away on business a lot, sexting is a great way to bring you and your significant other close together and let her know you’re still only thinking of her.
  1. Do Sext in Public – There’s something erotic about engaging in a dirty conversation with your love interest while out to dinner or at a party. Your friends may not know what’s going on but the two of you do and that sexy secret can pull you closer together.
  1. Do Sext Your Secret Fantasies – If you’re naturally shy, sexting can give you a chance to express your secret desires without having to look her in the eye. Be prepared. She might reveal some erotic fantasies of her own!
  1. Leave Something to the Imagination – Sending totally nude photos can be sexy, but it can also come on too strong. Leave a little to the imagination and encourage her to do the same. After all, you never know where these photos might end up if the relationship ends.


  1. Don’t Show Your Friends – When you start sexting with your significant other, it should stay just between the two of you. Forwarding her messages or photos to your buddies is a breach of trust. It’s the technological equivalent of letting your best friend watch her shower through a peephole.
  1. Don’t Sext Right Away – If you just met her, don’t sext. One, she may think you’re a creep. Two, she may end up putting the pictures online as soon as you break up. Sexting requires trust. If you don’t have it, wait. Things will progress on their own.
  1. Don’t Forget to Delete – If she sends you a hot pic, don’t save it to your online album. Many mobile phones automatically save to a folder on the Internet. Disable this feature before you start sexting. And don’t forget to delete them from your phone. If your cell ever gets stolen, so do those pictures of your wife in nothing but lacy white panties.
  1. Don’t Sext Your Grandma – Okay, you’d never do this on purpose but make sure you double and triple check your hot message is going to the right person before you press ‘send’. It will save you a lot of back-peddling and embarrassment later on.

Don’t Sext Outside of the Relationship – This is common sense. Sending sexy messages or photos to somebody who isn’t your significant other is cheating. It’s that simple.
Sexting should be mutual and fun. If either of you are uncomfortable with it or you just can’t think of what to say, maybe this type of flirting isn’t for you. That’s okay. There’s plenty of other ways to spice up your love life. Just remember to start slow, experiment, and keep it just between the two of you. And to avoid any of those private photos ending up online, always practice safe sext!

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