Shy men often have a hard time picking up women. If you’re a shy guy, you have to take a different approach. Learn how to get her to notice you and choose you over the smooth-talker every time.
- Join a Club
Shy men don’t feel comfortable just walking up to women at bars or clubs. If you’re a shy guy looking to meet Ms. Right, join a club. One of the best places to meet new people in a casual setting is www.meetup.com. It’s free to join and can connect you with hundreds of like-minded individuals in your area. Here you can join a hiking club, book club, restaurant club, etc. The possibilities are endless and limited only by your interests. Shy guys work better in casual settings so this is a great place to start.
- Date Online
Shy men who want to meet women for casual dating can find it easier to get online first. There are plenty of dating websites out there for men and women who just want to meet each other and have fun. Just be sure you put your best foot forward on your online dating profile and meet in person as soon as you can.
It can be very tempting for shy men to keep things online and delay meeting in person. The longer you wait, the more difficult it gets. Also, date in the local area. You could find your soulmate hundreds of miles away but it only complicates things and keeps them online. Are you really star-crossed lovers or are you just nervous about meeting women who live nearby?
- Keep it Casual
Just because it’s a first date doesn’t mean you have to rent a limo and take her to a five-star restaurant. Suggest meeting in the park or going out for a cup of coffee. Keep things light and casual and you’ll be less likely to let your shyness get in the way.
- Let go of Expectations
One of the most challenging obstacles shy men run into when dating is having high expectations. Maybe it’s all that time in front of the TV watching how Hollywood gets two people together but in real life, stuff happens. Your car could break down on the highway on the way to the concert.
You might have dandruff flakes on your shoulder when you lean in for a kiss goodnight. She’s not expecting perfection, just a man who cares enough to treat her like a lady and show her a good time. When you let go of expectations, you let go of the nervousness that can make your shyness almost crippling.
- Play to Your Strengths
When you’re a shy guy, it’s important to play to your strengths. If you’re not a rough-and-tumble sportsman, don’t try to impress her by suddenly turning into one. (You’ll only embarrass yourself.) Don’t take her jet-skiing or zip-lining if speed bumps make you queasy. Take her to a museum, a coffee shop, or a movie. A more intimate, cozy setting is a great place to get to know each other in a casual environment.
- Let Her Talk About Her
Shy men don’t talk about themselves all the time and she might find that very refreshing. Let her talk about her. Ask open-ended questions that invite her to express herself. A woman who feels she can talk about herself will feel more comfortable and close to you.
- Revamp Your Inner Dialogue
Shy men often lack confidence. Pay attention to your inner dialogue when you’re around women in dating situations. What are you saying to yourself? “I could never get a girl like her. She’s out of my league.” or “I’m bald and have a spare tire. I’m like a brother to every woman I meet.”
If this negative self-talk sounds familiar, you’ll project it everywhere you go. Women will be able to sense it, even if you’re smiling at them and delivering a few of your best lines. Chalk it up to a Law of Attraction thing but it’s true. If you think you can’t get her or you’re not good enough for her, she’ll sense it and be immediately turned off.
The best way to attract a woman into your life if you’re a shy guy is to project confidence. Think of all the good qualities you have and can offer a woman. Focus on these when you make your approach and she’ll be much more interested.
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What a shy guy needs is a confident girl! 🙂 But getting her is the problem here. Yes definitely agree, play to your strengths. There is no point starting off being something you’re not only to disappoint her later. Girls take such things to heart. Just adding a few more things to the article, you need to believe more in yourself and be less concerned of what the girls will think of you. Forget about that for now and concentrate on yourself. Don’t be ashamed of your shyness, that’s who you are…if you accept that there’s still hope for you. If you meet with failures and rejections on the way, don’t worry, they are part of life. All of us have faced rejections at one point or another. Get back into the game and don’t give up. All the best guys! 🙂